i need some physical affection and 3 bottles of vodka
A moment of silence to all the kids who can’t wait to become a teenager because they think it’s fun
Two hours of silence for all the teenagers who can’t wait to become adults because they think they’ll get to do whatever they want
a shot of vodka to all the 20 somethings who are coping with a lack of rent money by sitting around eating captain crunch in dinosaur PJs wishing they were actually a pre-teen again.
Half a glass of wine for all the thirty-somethings who would prefer a shot of vodka but they can no longer even look at booze without getting hungover and people have to go to work in the morning. Get off my lawn
walking around in underwear and a blanket cape like the fuckin queen of unemployment
if ur screwing up ur life cuz u are a perfectionist with major anxiety who procrastinates and spends way too much time on the internet clap ur hands
team “i wore this yesterday but i’m going to a different place so it doesn’t matter”
Finish the 6 MORE STEPS on
How To Get Nothing Done: An Illustrated Guide [Click to finish me off]
Hey, here’s a thing I did for Collegehumor! Super excited to be doing some work with these dudes. Go read the rest!
"what do you want to do after college?"
"ideally, dismantle the power structure of current society"
why are people so afraid of people who are comfortable with not being super skinny like i’ll steal your man AND your ice cream cone i dont give a fuck